Homeowners’ Associations are notorious breeding grounds for hostility and disagreement.  Comedians make jokes about it.  Advice columnists offer tips on how to manage it.  Lawyers make big bucks trying to resolve it.  Why are HOAs so ripe for conflict and adversity?  Simply put, HOAs are made up of people and people sometimes have a hard time getting along, and the larger the group or the more diverse the worldviews, the harder it can be.  As community consultant Diana Leafe Christian reports in her book on communities, Creating a Life Together, 90 percent of intentional communities fail—in large part because of conflict.  An intentional community is a group of people, like us, who have chosen to share resources, in our case, a farm.  As a community we face an overwhelming set of challenges.  The odds are stacked against us, and the statistics predict our failure.

“If I were to make one recommendation to a group of folks trying to live on land together… it is to seek out education and training on how to make decisions together.”  Diana Leafe Christian

“I’m willing to help out, but I don’t want to be part of a committee and have to follow all of those committee rules, like having to give three-days’ notice,” said one neighbor in regard to the rule that requires a three-day notice to the membership before a committee meeting.  Like all HOAs Farmcolony operates according to a set of regulations provided in our governing documents and state law. The state also expects groups like ours to observe the principles and rules of common parliamentary law. 

Parliamentary law is the means by which organizations make decisions. In short, it is all of the laws and rules of an organization that govern the transaction of business.  According to the Pocket Guide to Parliamentary Procedure, good parliamentary procedure “ensures justice to everyone, prescribes order, reflects kindness and generosity, provides constructive use of limited time and gives one a sense of self-confidence.”  Justice.  Order.  Kindness.  Generosity.  Can parliamentary procedure really deliver these results?

Parliamentary procedures are the rules that help us maintain order and ensure fairness in all decision-making processes.  It provides a framework within which a group can consider issues and resolve disputes. Rules are created to ensure and balance the rights of various groups within the organization and provide checks and balances against “power over” behaviors.

 “A single conversation should not lead to action,” Christian adds.  “When the impact of a decision is widespread throughout the community, then so must be the vetting process. This requires multiple opportunities to discuss, consider, change minds, object, re-evaluate, and reshape what is being proposed. The goal is to leave no one out of the discussion.” 

“Instead of a battle, you want to have minimal barriers to soliciting relevant input and to welcome divergent views,” according to Laird Schaub, co-founder of the Fellowship for Intentional Community (FIC). “Rather than responding to differences with combat (We were doing fine until you spoke), in cooperative culture you try to respond with curiosity (Why does that person see this differently —maybe I’m missing something).”

Parliamentary law suggests that “It is important for the betterment and advancement of the organization to engage all the members in active participation in all the functions of the organization.” When only a few members are allowed to rise to the top, cliques form and resentment and ill will are created, and, worse, other members’ talents are left untapped. 

One reason that these rules exist in the world of parliamentary procedure is to protect every member’s right to be there and participate in the group’s decisions.  The three-day notice requirement of a meeting ensures that all members have an opportunity to participate and no one is left out, unintentionally or otherwise.

 “The purpose of parliamentary procedure is to facilitate the transaction of business and to promote cooperation and harmony,” Alice Sturgis, Sturgis Standard Code of Parliamentary Procedure. 

The rules of parliamentary law are constructed upon a careful balance of the rights of the majority and the rights of the minority.  A majority vote decides an issue.  Each member agrees to be governed by the vote of the majority.  Parliamentary rules help to determine the will of the majority of those attending a meeting.  Although the ultimate decision rests with a majority, all members have such basic rights as the right to be heard and the right to oppose. The rights of all members– majority and minority–should be a concern of every member, for a person may be in a majority on one question but in the minority on the next. 

Common parliamentary procedures provide rules to make sure certain things happen, like a two-thirds vote to end discussion on a topic. (That higher-threshold vote of two-thirds is required because the group is cutting off a basic right of each member – the right to discuss and offer an opinion.) Or like quorum and notice requirements for special meetings.  The Farmcolony Board of Directors applies parliamentary procedure when they create a meeting agenda and make motions.  Motions are a key feature in parliamentary law. Robert’s Rules of Order is the most commonly used parliamentary book and is easily available online.

Some may think “we don’t use parliamentary procedure” or “we have our own way of doing things,” but state laws expect groups to observe proper parliamentary procedures. Courts have held that all organizations are subject to the principles and rules of common parliamentary law even in the absence of specific rules.  Experts say adherence to rules of order is especially important when there are disputes or particularly contentious issues.  In fact, they say, the best time to consult a parliamentary procedure manual is when there is a conflict.  It is the rules of order that can help guide you through the conflict to an agreeable conclusion. 

“Community living is the longest, most expensive personal growth workshop you’ll ever take.”  Diana Leafe Christian

“In its loftiest conception, Table Mountain was about community, self-reliance, and sustainability,” said one former member of this  cooperative community. “All too often, however, pettiness, inexperience, insecurity, and selfishness got in the way – and I was not above the fray.” 

Justice.  Order.  Kindness.  Generosity.  Is it possible?  There are ways to get along in an HOA, experts suggest.  It is most important that members be respectful of each other’s point of view and of the democratic process in making decisions. Follow these tried-and-true tips from seasoned professionals in the field and peaceful living in our HOA should follow.